LOVE ME FOR WHO I AM

One evening last week, my wife and I were
getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to
heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't
feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT?!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband
on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my
emotional needs as a woman enough for
me to satisfy your physical needs as a
man." She responded to my puzzled look
by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I
am and not what I do for you in the
bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen
that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day
off of work to spend time with her. We
went out to a nice lunch and then went
shopping at a big department store. I
walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She
couldn't decide which one to take, so I told
her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new
shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I
said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."
We went on to the jewellery department
where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. She was so excited. She must
have thought I was one wave short of a
shipwreck. I started to think she was
testing me because she asked for a tennis
bracelet when she doesn't even know how
to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
"That's fine, honey." She was so excited.
Smiling with anticipation, she finally said,
"I think this is all dear, let's go to the
cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I
blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her
jaw dropped, "WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to
HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not
in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping
needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she
was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't
you just love me for who I am and not for
the things I buy you?"